Sex Addicts Anonymous Primary Purpose

Recovery from sex addiction

"We, who have recovered..."

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Frequently Asked Questions

  • What is sex addiction and how can I tell if I have it?

    What is sex addiction and how can I tell if I have it?   There are many different definitions of addiction. The treatment and therapy industries probably have their own definition. The state/gover...

  • How is working the 12 Steps different than therapy?

    How is working the 12 Steps different than therapy?   As a fellowship Sex Addicts Anonymous cannot express any opinion on therapy, good or bad. It is considered to be an outside issue (reference Tr...

  • How does this approach define abstinence?

    The Three Circles Using the Big Book     “Simple, but not easy; a price had to be paid.” Pg 14 (first paragraph)   As chronic sex addicts of the hopeless variety, we have little or no idea how t...

  • What is the purpose of 12 Step meetings?

    What is the purpose of 12 Step meetings?       We have experienced much confusion on this subject. We see two distinct subjects that need to be clarified. These are the fellowship in S.A.A. and th...

  • What are the Twelve Traditions and why are they so important?

    What are the Traditions?    See Individual Traditions     In the disease of sex addiction, we found ourselves unable to stay away from behaviors; that we admitted were killing ourselves and ca...

  • Why the Big Book of A.A.?

    Why the Big Book of A.A.? Back in the early days of Twelve Step before the existence of the Big Book, Bill Wilson in conferring with Dr Bob Smith (the co-founders of the 12 Step movement) both notice...

  • What are the Twelve Steps?

    What Are the Twelve Steps? The Twelve Steps summarize a system of actions designed to bring us into a relationship with the God of the individual members understanding. After we have worked the Steps...

  • Is this a religion or a cult?

      Are Twelve Step fellowships a religion? Are they a cult?   A.A.'s long form of the Tenth Tradition:   No A.A. group or individual should ever, in such a way as to implicate A.A., express any op...

  • What is a sponsor?

    What is a sponsor?  A sponsor is a qualified member of a Twelve Step fellowship who has been spiritually awakened as the result of working the Twelve Steps and shows another how to live by these prin...

  • How do I start a Big Book study?

    We recommend that you don't. The healthiest meetings we have ever experienced started by their membership focusing on that which they had power. These meetings weren't started until those who wished...

How is working the 12 Steps different than therapy?

 

As a fellowship Sex Addicts Anonymous cannot express any opinion on therapy, good or bad. It is considered to be an outside issue (reference Traditions 8 & 10). Individual members of our fellowship may have had good experiences with therapy or not, but when expressing an opinion one way or the other, they do so as individuals but not as members of S.A.A. Since therapy/treatment is an outside issue and/or an outside enterprise, we are clearly stating that these things are not the same as a Twelve Step Program. Their methods and goals are different than that of the Twelve Step Program. We merely wish to point out that therapy, treatment and professional counseling should not be confused with working the Twelve Steps.

 

Dr. Bob, one of the co-founders of the Twelve Step movement, in his final address to Alcoholics Anonymous said,

 

 

Let's keep this thing simple. Let's not louse this thing up with a lot of Freudian complexes and things which are very interesting to the scientific mind, but have very little to do with our actual A.A. work. Our Twelve Steps, when simmered down to the last, resolve themselves into the words “Love” and “Service.”

 

 

The American Psychology Association uses this working definition of therapy (psychotherapy):

 

 

Psychotherapy is the informed and intentional application of clinical methods and interpersonal stances derived from established psychological principles for the purpose of assisting people to modify their behaviors, cognitions, emotions, and/or other personal characteristics in directions that the participants deem desirable. (Norcross, 1990, p. 218-220 )

 

 

The aim of our program is to have a spiritual awakening. We see spirituality as an active relationship with that which each individual sees as most high in existence. Some refer to that as “God.” We will use this term often. We do so only as a matter of convenience and not as an endorsement of any belief system. We understand a spiritual awakening as simply bringing to consciousness our individual relationships with that which each of us sees as most high in existence. We do this by a simple system called “The Twelve Steps.” They are a collection of specific actions that is summarized on page 164 of the book Alcoholics Anonymous:

 

 

Abandon yourself to God as you understand God. Admit your faults to Him and your fellows. Clear away the wreckage of your past. Give freely of what you find....

 

 

The methods, approaches and goals of therapy and treatment are varied and numerous. They are beyond the scope of our understanding and this web page. Nonetheless, their practitioners are human beings relying on human power and human understanding to achieve these. We are in no position to argue with those who have found happy freedom from their sexual obsession by therapy, counseling or treatment. In fact, we would like to congratulate such individuals. But we were unable to do so by the same method. The Big Book is very clear, though, about the “real alcoholic” (or in our case the “real sex addict”).

 

 

Whether such a person can quit upon a nonspiritual basis depends upon the extent to which he has already lost the power to choose whether he will drink or not. Alcoholics Anonymous Pg 34

 

This makes the converse also true. We have lost the power to choose whether we will begin our addictive sexual behaviors or not. The only solution we found was something greater than human power.

 

We do not wish to refute anyone's ability to stop their addiction by human means. We found we needed something more than human power. We merely wish to keep the focus of our fellowship on our program. If you have recovered by therapy, perhaps a therapy based fellowship would be more suited to support you. If you recovered by attending meetings and re-socialization, then perhaps a re-socialization fellowship would be a better place for you to recover. If you find that these fellowships don't exist, we encourage you to start one. We may refer people to you if you do. However, our meetings and our fellowship are meant only to support the program called the Twelve Steps. We are qualified to do nothing else.

 

 

Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program,.... Alcoholics Anonymous pg 58

 

 

If you have tried everything you know to be free of your sexual obsessions including the afore mentioned, then we would like to offer you this thread of hope: we have found something that works for us. It might also work for you if you are at the end of your rope. Our experiences show that it did not work if we divided ourselves between programs. We encourage all who think there are other ways to recover to try those other routes before exploring this one. We each had to know there was no other escape before we could completely give ourselves to this program.